You’re Playing Games With A Friend, But, Who Gets First Controller?

Here is a question that still comes up at times when you are playing with a friend on the same system…”So, who gets the first controller?”

Let us start with the basics, whoever owns the system gets the first controller… ALWAYS. Now, I know what you are thinking, “But they told me it was OK to use it.” Short Answer: Stop being a ‘Richardson’, they were just being nice.

One of my brothers used to come and we would play a lot of video games… I mean, a lot of video games. We never had this question come up because it’s just an unwritten rule…like if you pour a lot of milk in your Lucky Charms and then realize your wife doesn’t have enough to eat her healthy cereal, you just add water to the jug before she gets up… don’t judge me.

But, what about when you invite your friend over to play a split-screen game and while you’re setting things up and turn around, you see it… they have your precious… that part of you that knows every dark secret you have… your most coveted item in the house (sorry kids), the master of disaster, first controller. I know half of you just passed out at the very thought of it… I’ll give you a second or two… and we’re back.

What do you say in that nightmare? I have the perfect phrase for those situations, “Hey, can I see that a second?” When they give it to you just casually reach down and get ‘the backup’ controller (you know the one, it’s like that crazy cousin you only see twice a year on the holidays) and hand it to them. If you’re like me, and everyone should be, then you reach into the Dorito bag and grab the first chip you come to and thump him/her in the head with it, just because.

Wars have started over things like this. Who does not understand controller-etiquette? It is not hard like it’s that last slice of pizza in the box when four of you look down and notice it… that’s every man for himself, and anything goes. This is the first controller, respect.

We should not even have to think about something so traumatic on a Friday. Life’s too short to be stuck with your very own second controller, on your own system, do not be ‘that’ victim. I have like, a hundred other things I could say on this, and examples I could give, but just do not be a Noob and pick up the first controller on a system you don’t own. And if you come to my house and do it, I always have a bag of Doritos handy… those things are like ninja throwing stars.